22/04/23 this past week has been loads of procrastination and quick website progress. i feel rusty with my art lately, like i'm a bit more directionless now that portfolio season is over. i've been going through another one of my depressed isolation phases, which always come out of nowhere and leave whenever they feel like it. they used to be a lot worse but now it's more just like, i can hardly get out of bed and do anything except watch youtube or follow up on appointments/work obligations. my leaast favourite part is that i just completely detach from everyone and everything. the derealization/depersonalization and Those kinds of thoughts used to be real bad when i was younger but now it's more just like, floating from distraction to distraction listlessly, vaguely detached. i miss my friends but i flip back and forth so often it's easier to drift away than it is to actually keep up with them. i also get agitated rlly easily and my self esteem is dog shit until something random happens that pulls me back into functioning again. it's weird. on a nicer note, setting up this website has kept me going for the past week. i'm like, not feeling well and i'm behind on a lot of school work, but i still made something and i like how it turned out.